If I was to write an “Epic” now, following off from our last one, I would be typing for weeks, the result been a small novel!

So this is gonna be a brief summary.

Vancouver, Victoria, Port Hardy, Prince Rupert

Thanks for helping us carry our bags Bruce + Nic!

Inside passage was beautiful! Alas it was also raining, but then again, what do you expect from a temperate rainforest zone!

Ferries

All our trips on the Ferries were way cool. We slept outside on the top covered deck (roof and 3 walls, with heaters!), and watched the mist, humpbacks and black and white porpoises go by, FLUKE! *click**click**click* (in-joke).

We went to presentations about bears and the temperate zones of the Alaskan panhandle (a fed bear is a dead bear; if its got a hump, be a lump, if its black, fight back).

The Scenery was indescribable, so I am not going to try and describe it!
Just think New Zealand’s South Island’s West Coast + fjords

Ketchikan

Fresh Salmon! OMG Orgasmicallydeliciousyummiemmmmm.
We stayed at the Ketchikan YHA, cooked some fresh salmon given to the host and met some friends (Hi Carol for Xmas!). I forgot where I left Sylvia’s Email (damn). We walked to the top of the local peak (well, only ½ way cos we ran out of time), and saw a beautiful view of Ketchikan, just as it started to rain. Sylvia went off to the peak, while we RAN down the mountain to grab our bags before the hostel shut at 1pm (got there 1min late, but still got our bags. Whew, that was tiring!). That was 2 miles down, 3 miles long.

Juneau

Nice place, Got taken out to dinner by a Tlingtic’s chief’s son, mmmm steak! Met Carol again (Xmas!) went and saw a glacier (blue) then rushed off to see Skagway.

Skagway

Because Cruise ships go this way, most of the towns we visited have a substantial part of them devoted to the tourists (i.e. tourist trap), however Skagway was even more so. Still, we got a wonderful free tour of the historical sites around Skagway (soapy smith) before camping for the night.

The next day we caught a bus to Whitehorse, with a really friendly bus driver (it was us and 3 other passengers), he even dropped us off at the Greyhound bus terminal (the bus was a Greyline bus). We passed even more beautiful scenery, and the movie “White Fang” now makes a lot more sense.

Bus

70 hours, no sleep, and a cold later we were back in Vancouver. Had dinner with Bruce and Nik (MMMMM yummie curry). We walked over a suspension bridge, watched a boy for 30 minutes while he decided to jump to his death or not (we left before he decided to jump into a deep stream pool over a bluff that he might hit, or not), didn’t see any bears, then caught the plan to London.

London

Mind the Gap.
*click**click**click* the camera went, we stayed with the most generous and friendly man in the world, Lenio, before Eurostarring to Paris.

Paris

The Metro has a smaller billet.
PJ didn’t Show up (hmmm?), so it was the Metro by ourselves.
Dropped our bags off at the YHA.
*click**click**click* EiffelTowerNotreDamnOtherFamousStuff *click**click**click*
Howard growls at us for turning up at 11pm and waking him up, we meet Ann and Kuini, sleep.

France and Bron/Brou

We drove down France during the Petrol Blockade (Why are all those cars Queuing at the petrol station I wonder). I spoke broken French, and we saw 17th century priests golden weave cloaks and stained glass windows about the Kiwi and the Pom that crashed their plane in WWII to save a school. Got to Bayonne and caught the train to Saint Jean Port de Pied.

Santiago Who?

Rome, Jerusalem, Santiago.
The three most important pilgrimages during the middle ages.

Somehow the corpse of Saint James ended up in Northwest Spain (Galicia) and soon you had pilgrims walking from everywhere to get there.

When the Moors occupied Spain, St James somehow ended up being St James the Moorslayer. He was the mythical person who appeared in the battles on his white charge to trample over the Moors, ensuring a victory for the Christian Armies.

We walked 800km from St Jean Port de Pied to Santiago de Compestella. Over around 4 mountain ranges, through arid vineyard desert (OMG La Rioja Grapes, There are not enough adjectives in the English language to describe how Devine the grapes that they grow here are, I would just move to Spain alone, just to be able to eat another bunch of those grapes) to the rain soaked green valleys of Galicia.

We have seen Cathedrals in Burgos, Leon, Astorga, and Santiago, not to mention the numerous ruins, castles and villages. We have seen the sun rise over the burnt fields of Burgos, and have dined at twilight in castle ruins overlooking villages in the valley below.

This is just a summary, there is no was I can fit our Camino in anything less than a 1000 page epic (well, maybe not that much).

The People. The Beautiful Brazilians, the Spanish locals, The Wonderful French Couples, The Arrogant and Rude French Groups, the Inconsiderate Spanish bikers. Vino y Compeid™ Bread so fresh it is too hot to touch. Been Kissed by a Spanish Wino (YUCK!). Walking in the mist and looking up and seeing blue sky.

And of course, our wonderful friends.

Party

Boy, I haven’t been that drunk since Uni. Still, after walking 800km you would do some partying as well, I would think.

We ate at the Parador (5 star hotel) for free. Did some Tourist Shopping, bumped into all the friends we had lost, and exchanged emails and contacts.

Finisterre

One a overcast sunday we caught a bus to Finisterre. While it was raining, we did one final walk to the end of the peninsular to the real end of our camino. We stood at the end of the old world and burnt my Camino T-shirt (Thanks Mike) while eating Melon and reflecting on our lives. Deep.

London

Met the Belgium guy (I forget your name, but its written down somewhere around here…) at the place you stay for 3 nights after finishing the Camino

BONJOUR! On the night of our departure we bump into the only friend we haven’t yet met in Santiago. We had lost her out of O’Ceberio and thought we might never see her again. We swapped addresses and went to bed.

Got up, had breakfast with Danielle at the Parador, Caught the bus to the Airport and Flew to London.

Still in London

Lenio has been a life saving godsend. He has let us use his flat, phone, computer and Internet. Heck, he has even cooked us dinner. This man is our savior.

Boy, this place is busy. We got a Cell phone each to help with getting a job, and we have been on the phone every day trying to find a flat. Whoa.

Geri +44 7855 931 172
Richard +44 7855 931 267

We splashed out and got some cell phone holders (me Tigger, Geri Eeyore) from the Disney store. Otherwise our money has been going on the tube and food.

*BANG*
*BANG*

Hey, Remember Guy Fawlks? They still have double happys and bangers. It sounds like a war zone outside. It’s Great. Screw those kill joys back home who ruined Guy Fawlks forever!

Complaining Bit

England is the capital of Catch-22 Bureaucracy.

To get a bank account, you need proof of an address, and a job.
To get a job, you need a bank account, and a NI number.
To get a flat, you need a bank account and a job.
To get an NI number, you need proof of an Address.
ARGH!

1) Set up a bank account from home BEFORE you leave.
2) Sign up with agencies ASAP.
3) Stay with Antipodeans cos they aren’t as anal about renting accommodation.

It will take us 2 week to sort out our bank account (and Geri still doesn’t have a cheque account!). The Banking systems here are CRAP (you need separate EFTPOS/switch cards to access your cheque and savings account), and the streets are too busy and its cold and raining and wet and windy *boohoohoo*

Well, that’s about it, with all the interesting stories cut out. I will be doing an epic to end all epics when I get settled (that and insidiously take over the world, eeep).

Laters
-Richard Maxwell and Geraldine Mora

Its Friday, we leave Tomorrow morning for Vancouver, Alaska, London, Paris, Spain.
This is the last you will hear from us in a while, thanks for listening, and REPLYING! With NEWS! So we have EMAILS TO READ. (Aside) Hehe, I think they get the point Geri.

Skippy
The Clock
TV
14km Buffalo
The Fort
Bagpipes
Beer, Boston and Computer Games
Road Trip
Cold Stuff
Wet
Camping
Banff and the Bull Elk
Vicky
Planning
To be Continued?

Skippy

O.K., Ever since buddy had that altercation with a deck chair and a leash, he has been pretty timid. Skippy, on the other hand, is always up to mischief.

Skippy is a smart cat. He has figured out our daily routine. So in order to sleep with us during the night, he sneaks in before we go to bed, and hides underneath our bed. After shutting the door so Skippy can’t get in, we turn off the lights and go to bed. Soon after, Skippy sneaks out from under the bed, and cuddles up at our feet. He then cuddles up between us, pushing us apart. Finally he starts licking our hair, at which point we wake up and kick him out. Goddamit!

Skippy has also learnt how to take the top off Francine’s hair tie box. As Skippy has a weird fascination with hair ties, we see him running all over the house chasing and biting the things. Once he has lost a tie underneath a couch or something, he just goes and steals another one.

Skippy loves to explore, however he now jumps over the fence to explore outside whenever we do stuff in the garden. Therefore Geri and I have to chase after him, so he runs away, chase, run, chase, run, pounce, meooOOOW, GERRBACKINSIDEYOUPESKYCAT!

I Don’t even want to know what happens when Skippy figures out how to open the patio door.

Oh yea, Skippy also knows how to undo the clip of his cat collar.

The Clock

Francine brought a DYI paper clock. She never started it. So Geri decided to work on it while I was busy doing my electronics projects. I gave up/finished my projects, Geri didn’t.

She is making a Pendulum and weight driven clock. Completely out of paper and glue (and the odd metal shaft or two, and some string, and some coins for weight, and some lead sinkers too). However it has not all gone to plan.

Making the clock is &$^#&ing hard! The glue likes to warp the cogs, and now and then you are a millimeter out here and there, these mistakes add up causing sticky operation and lots of headaches for Geraldine. That and the fact that it takes AGES to make, 48 hours my arse!

However, Geraldine isn’t giving up. The clock looks great, and she is going to work on it until she goes to bed tonight, she is around 80% done.

Whenever we test the clock Skippy and Buddy become REALLY ANNOYING. Why? Because the clock has dangling bit and swinging bits, which are great play toys for cats. ARGH! GERRAWAYFROMTHECLOCKLEAVETHATALONEGETORFF! That and the fact that Geraldine has all the pieces of the clock over the dining table, which Skippy likes to play on. Skippy jumps onto the table, messes things up, I pick him up and throw him off, repeat 12 times before Skippy gets the drift. And I thought Skippy was smart.

TV

Ok, we live on a diet of Friends, Frasier, Who wants to be a Millionaire? And the Drew Carry show.
Drew Carry is funny.

Now and then I get a treat of catching Due South (BEST TV SERIES EVER!) Farscape, or DS9 (1:30am)
That’s all.

14km Buffalo

Francine, Peter, Geraldine and I went for a walk in Elf Island park again on the 8th of July. We decided to walk for more than 3km, so we chose the 13.8km Shirley Lakes track. Not a long distance in itself, except when your right hiking boot decides to make it a walk of UTTER LIVING MISERY! Ouch, 5 minutes into the walk it started rubbing, and I couldn’t do a damn thing about it. Bah.

As you know, there are quite a few bison around Elk Island park, and today was no exception. Three quarters through the walk, we come across this open camping field (not populated), as well as a herd of 5 buffalo. After both groups watched each other for a few moments, we walked along the edge of the field, while shitting our pants
“pleasepleaseplease don’t charge”

Whew.

After the park we walked along the track in the bush again. We turn a corner and …. BUFFALO. There he was, a big fat large scary buffalo only TEN METERS INFRONT OF US AAAAAAAARG! After waiting about a million years of time, we decided to walk off the track and walk around him. Peter started to walk in the shrub, and this must have startled the buffalo. He started to run away from us towards another open field off track. Good god, the ground trembled! I swear!

Pumped on adrenaline we finished the last 5 km of the walk in 12 seconds. At the end of the trip we noticed two *^$#%ing large Ravens playing on the roof of the toilets. Hey, make that three. They were huge! Like, a 1m wing tip to wing tip sort of big. That deserved a photo.

The Fort

The “Family” went to the Fort Edmonton Historical Park. Its a period park, where all the people there are dressed up in the clothes for the period, doing period stuff.

There they had the replica of the Edmonton fort, which was here the Legislator building was. It was made of wood. Mmmmmm wood. First off, we get to go on a real steam engine train. WOO WOO! We then trekked through the fort, caught a period play/skit took a photo, and kept going. There was an Indian village there (yay for Helen!), with an “Indian Girl” doing the laundry.

We then walked through early 20th century stuff before returning back to the entrance and going home.
OKOK, So I wrote jack all about the trip in my Diary. Sue me.

Saw and old printers shop, a Jewelry shop, General store and all sorts. You could by stuff from the bakery and General store there. Neat.

Oh yea, there were trams there as well. And a Jail, and a Tannery.

Did I mention that Fur Trading was one of Canada’s big money earners, and that Fort Edmonton was a trading station for the furs that got moved down the river to Hudson bay. That’s how Edmonton came to be. Then they found Oil, and got rich instead of becoming a ghost town when the fur trade died.

Bagpipes

I like bagpipes, I always have. Might try and learn the silly instrument. We went to a Klondike Festivals thing at Winston Churchill square in downtown, and all of a sudden I hear bagpipes. Not the boring droning ones your hear at parades, but a peppy, Irish dancing sort of bagpipe.

Curious I went to the big stage and there were a bunch of young musicians making bagpipe and fiddle music. At the center was a guy making an orgasm face while playing the bagpipes, while funny to look at the music was awesome. Slainte mhath (slawn-cha-va, http://www.slaintemhath.com) was the name of the band, they came from Nova Scotia, which has a strong Scottish heritage. We brought the CD for $20 CAN.

Cool.

Beer, Boston and Computer Games

Geri and I were sleeping in as we always do, until the phone rang.
“you geterit zzzzzz”
So I get up at the ungodly hour of 9:30am and answer the phone.
“Hi, its Francine, is Geri there?”
“zzzp, eur….Err, she’s sleeping *YAWN*”
“Tell her to get up cos we are going to Boston in 3 hours”
“O.K.”
-click-

“Hey Geri, get up, your going to Boston in three hours”
“zzzzp * eh? Oh, that’s nice. Zzzzzzzz”

After jumping up and down on Geri, I wake her up. She automatically drops from idle to overdrive panic stress mode and starts packing. Francine comes over an hour later from work, and they wait for the Taxi.
Hugs and Kisses later I have finally rid myself of the Geraldine for an entire week. MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH *breath* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Well, Geri was gone from the Monday to the Friday (I Think). Peter and I played computer games till sunrise, watch 7 hours of classic Sci-Fi Videos. And I played on the computer all day. WOOP!

So what if Geri went to Cheers, where everyone knows your name. Went to Salem and the Boston tube. Got drunk on the first class flights, got hit on by a cute steward, and played in the cockpit. I had fun playing on a computer … all ……. Day. Hmmmm.

Oh yea.
Beer!

Road Trip

Ok, Geri got back and my plans for taking over the world were foiled again (damn those pesky kids, if it wasn’t for them I would have gotten away with it!)

A few weeks passed and then the Family decided it was time to go to Banff! Cool! It was long weekend time.
Geri Packed that Friday, I played on computer, Geri got pissed off.
I packed that Morning, I did little to help pack the car, Geri got pissed off.
We left at 1pm, and we drove, and drove and drove.
We Arrive at Jasper around 7pm, and started to drive to Banff, looking for a campground to stay at.
We drove, and drove. Camp FULL, camp FULL. Drive, drive, next petrol station 100km, hmm, quarter of a tank left.
We drove, and drove. Camp FULL, camp FULL. Drive, drive, hmm, tank at empty, drive, coast, drive, coast.
Columbian Icefield center, they have accommodation…NOT!
Drive, coast, coast. Needle BELOW empty. Petrol 23km. Drive, coast, drive, coast. YAY WE MADE IT!
Whew!
Haha, as the only petrol station for yonks, he gets away with changing 20c/litre MORE than anywhere else, Geri paid to fill the tank, and it cost her $60 NZ. It was 88c/litre Canadian, that’s around $1.32 NZ.
Ok, after a bit of driving we find another campground, FUL…err, goto overflow. We goto the overflow and finally find a camp spot. 1am in the morning we get to sleep.

Oh yea, we also saw some Mountain Goats. They were white. Mmm goats.

Cold Stuff

Francine and Peter take us back to the Columbian Icefields, and while we took the Glacier tour, they went for a hike.

We went on the Athabasca Glacier Tour ($25.95 CAN/adult. Half for a 12 year or younger kid). We Bussed on a coach halfway, and then got a “SnoCoach” and actually drove onto the Glacier itself.
There are 23 SnoCoaches in the world, 22 at the glacier, and 1 in Antarctica. The Wheels themselves cost $5k each (CAN) and are as tall as Geri and as wide as Jacob Its a big air-conditioned MONSTA TRUCK, err, COACH. YEA! Top speed 30kph.

We drove down the steepest unpaved commercially used dirt road in the world (32 or 16 degrees, grade, can’t remember which) and onto the Glacier, which is blue/white/dirt coloured.

When we got to the turn around and get out and tour part of the trip, we were nicely confronted with a THUNDER AND LIGHTNING STORM, with rain as well. Oh yay. After the tour guide said that he can’t let us out and play in the lightning we stayed on the bus. He then said that if you *ahem* can’t see any lightning and thunder, then you can go out if you wish.

We took photos in the rain, got some pure 300 year old glacier water (it was �^%ing FREEZING!, my hand actually SNAPPED OFF! After I put it underwater to fill my water bladder bag thingie). This water is the shit, its seriously good stuff.

After the Photos were taken we got back onto the bus. Then the rain stopped �^$%#!

We drove back, took some more photos. Got back, went through the interpretive center at the Columbian Icefields center, and then met up with Francine and Peter. To go and find another campground for the night.

On looking for the campground we came across “Geraldine Lakes”, Since it was a 15km hike, we only got to see the sign, but that made Geri’s Day. We also went and saw the Athabascan Falls. Neato.

Wet

We drove to Lake Louise to see the pretty lake. Peter, Geraldine and I went for a walk through this busy tourist hell to get to the lake, no sooner had we stepped out of the truck, does that &^##^ing thunder storm catch up with us and piss all over us. We get to the lake, thoroughly drenched (eww, you can see my underwear through my white pants). Nice, I walk back, wet and grumpy. Five meters from the car and the rain stops. �^&ing *$^$ �$! If only we waited another 15 minutes we would have done this without getting wet. As Geri had the camera, she got a nice photo of Lake Louise and the Chateau.
We drove on looking for another camp spot, with me in my underwear being grumpy.

Camping

Ok, it wasn’t as bad as last time, we found our campsite on our third try. Camping at Two Jacks Lake campground (the one NOT on the lake, p.s. there are at least 3 youth hostels in Banff)

We set up the tents and started to cook dinner, when THAT �#^ing THUNDER STORM COMES ALONG! HATEHATEHATE!
We improvised a fake roof by tying plastic sheets Peter had in the RAV4 4wd, to trees using a bag of bungie cords. We Finally put up a cover for Mine and Geri’s Tent, as well as one over the picnic table. When the thunder storm from heck decides to STOP RAINING. HATEHATEHATE!

Anyway, we have dinner, I put on dry clothing, we have ROASTED MARSHMALLOWS and all is fine once more. Mmmmm, roasted marshmallows.

Oh yea, the silk sleeping bag liners are all static, so when we rub them against the sleeping bags at night, you can see little bolts of lightning going between the two – cool eh?

Geri likes the Camping life. Me? I don’t mind, as long as I DON’T GET WET! Haha, Geri thinks I’m a wimp.

Banff and the Bull Elk

The Next day we Decided to go for hike. While Francine stayed at camp to do some homework and work. After much deliberation, we decided to goto Johnston’s Falls.

On the way there were all these people parked on the side of the road, looking at something. Naturally we followed suit. There were three HUGH bull-elk eating in the forest next to the road. Peter, Geri and I got about 5-7 meters close (stupid people that we are) and took photos. Man these things are big. After a few photos we left the hubbub in the middle of nowhere.

The Falls are in two sets, the first is only 800m away from the touristy car park, while the second is 2.5km away from the first set of falls. The Walk is uphill (puff) and sometimes goes along a boardwalk. Where the boardwalk sticks out of the sides of the creek’s canyon walls. Cool.

The first set of falls were around 8-10 meters high, and you could go through a hole in the rocks near the fall to get a close-up and wet view of the falls. Took some Photos.

The Squirrels here must have been fed a lot by the people here (even though there are signs forbidding it), because they run up to you, squeak, and look cute. One guy had them climbing over him to get at the food in his hand. While cool, it also sucks. Damn tame (and FAT) squirrels.

We then did the hour walk up to the second falls. These falls were around 15-20 meters high. The walking platform extends over the stream so that you can see the falls around the corner. Unfortunately it was too wet for us to take a photo, but that didn’t stop Peter from taking one.

Well rested, we thought, what the hell, and decided to walk the 2.7k to the Ink Pots. These are pools of water where a spring flows into, leaving deposits of blue and yellow and green stuff. Dragging my ski-jacket for 5km in hot weather along the walk paid off, cos it started to rain. I didn’t get wet, and so I didn’t get grumpy. YAY! We made it to the Pots, took some photos. The colours and patterns in the pools were way cool (I need some more describing words of wonder and awe). Had some lunch, and walked back.

On the walk back we were passed by some people on horses carrying supplies for the campground that was another 15km from the Ink Pots. 20 minutes into the walk we were getting tired.
“Are we there yet Papa Smurf?”
Finally we made it back to the upper falls, then the lower falls, then the car. Whew. That 12km up and down hill made us really tired. We were knackered.

Got back to camp, had some dinner, had some ROASTED MARSHMALLOWS AND HOT CHOCOLATE! Went to sleep.

Oh yea, we had a fire pit thingie in a metal box on a pole, we barbecued all our food.
Oh yea, we had a bear sighting warning, so we had to leave all our food in the car (chilly bins are NOT bear proof) and all our rubbish in the campgrounds bear-proof bin.

If bears start eating human food and rubbish, they become a pest and are dangerous, and so have to be killed. Therefore its in every ones best interest to keep the camp looking and smelling clean.

Got up the next morning, packed up and left, all before 11am, WOW!

Vicky

Vicky Drum was in Canada, on her way to UnGlund (just say it), and had arranged for us to pick her up that Tuesday morning. However we had to ring her first. By the time we got into cell phone range, no one was answering the phone. We decided to drive into Calgary anyway to pick her up(only 30-60 min out of Banff).

An Hour later we drove into Calgary. Yawn. Tried to ring Vicky again, but no luck. We arrived at her house, but no-one was home. Apparently she had left to go shopping half an hour before we first rang. DOH!

Anyway, we drove back home, unpacked and blobbed.

The next day, We continued to plan our trip to Alaska and the Inside Passage. Vicky caught the bus over from Calgary ($50 can? Red Arrow) and came home with peter. We all had a catch up, and after I got all talked out, Geri and Vicky kept on nattering for another few hours, while I played on the computer/watched TV.

Over the span of the week we showed Vicky all the cool free stuff you can go to. The state Legislator and its Magic Spot, The Town Hall, and Whitemud park.

GRRR. We went to show Vicky the Beaver, but for the second time it was a no-show. Angry and Frustrated we started to leave the beaver spot, when all of a sudden Eagle Eye Geri goes
“(whisper, but a loud one) Ricky! Quick! The Camera!”
Geri had managed to see a great horned owl, in the MIDDLE OF THE GODDAM DAY! Comon! is Geri Gifted or what?
Vicky And I went to where Geri was, and sure enough there was a big fat white horned owl sitting on some branches on the other side of the stream. We all took photos before it flew away. It looked quite impressive flying away, if I was a house cat, I would be scared.

Anyway, we decided to take Vicky to our famous Squirrel and Chipmunk spot. We sat there, put some seeds out, and had lunch, waiting for the squirrels to come out and play.
Waiting…
Waiting…
Waiting…
Oh, COMON! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!
Waiting…
Oh, I Give up. After waiting 2 hours, there was nary a squirrel or Chipmunk to be seen. That has gotta suck. They must of figured we were going to show them to Vicky or something.
Sad, but still happy we left Whitemud and walked back home.

Took Vicky to Francine’s house and had a look around, had some fish and chips (oh how I miss takeaways).

Come Saturday, and Vicky has to leave. In the morning we took her via the bus ($1.65 for 2 hours, to anywhere) to West Edmonton Mall (biggest mall in the world, still). It was quite funny, for after she made the comment that its just like a big mall we showed her the dolphin pools
“oh f**k!”
and then showed her the theme park
“oh f**k!”
then the INDOOR ROLLERCOASTER, with a loop and a double loop.
“oh f**k!”
then the indoor WATER PARK
“oh f**k!”
then the golf driving range
“oh f**k!”
Hehe, I think our job is done, as I think Vicky was suitably impressed.

We then saw her off on the bus back to Calgary in the Afternoon. Waving like crazy people. Geeze, goddam NZers.

Planning

Ok, by now we have planned our Alaska, Inside Passage journey for over three weeks. Booking accommodation and travel. Whew.
So here it is, in all its glory, our travel itinerary.

Saturday 19th of August

Leave Edmonton 9:30am
Arrive Vancouver
Drop off Excess Luggage
Leave Vancouver
Arrive Victoria
Stay at backpackers Hostel [Canada-(250) 386 4471]

Sunday 20th of August

Do Touristy Stuff, stay at backpackers

Monday 21st of August

Leave Victoria Via Train
Arrive Courtnay
Leave Courtnay via Bus
Visit Cambell River
Arrive Port Hardy
Stay at Wild woods camp ground [Canada-(250) 949 6753]

Tuesday 22nd of August

Catch Inside Passage Ferry to Prince Rupert
Stay at Park Avenue Campground [Canada-(250) 624 5861]

Wednesday 23rd of August

Catch the Ferry to Ketchikan
Stay at YHA [USA-(907) 225 3319]

Thursday 24th of August

Catch Ferry to Juneau (overnighter)

Friday 25th of August

Do Touristy Stuff
Stay at YHA [USA-(907) 586 9559]

Saturday 26th of August

Ditto

Sunday 27th of August

Catch Ferry to Skagway
Stay at Mountain View RV Park [1-800-791-2673, call Telecom on how to ring an American 1-800 number]

Monday 28th of August

Catch a bus to Whitehorse
Only have 15 minutes to catch our connecting bus to Vancouver

Tuesday + Wednesday 29th and 30th of August

That’s all Bus Babeh!
Visit the Yukon, Dawson Creek and Prince George
Arrive at Vancouver on Wednesday at 9pm
Stay at YHA Downtown Vancouver [Canada-(604) 684 4565]

Thursday 31st of August

Tourist stuff
Stay at YHA

Friday 1st of September

Leave Vancouver for London

Saturday 2nd of September

Arrive Heathrow at 2:30pm, get grilled by customs, hopefully don’t get sent home for no apparent reason.

Staying at Lenio’s

Sunday 3rd of September

Be a London Tourist
Catch up with anyone I know in London, see the sites, play on the tube.
Stay at Lenio’s

Monday 4th of September

Get up bloody early to be at Waterloo by 7:30am
Catch the Eurostar to PARIS!
Meet with Pj, do tourist stuff
Meet up with Uncle Howard and the troop at the YHA [France-(01) 48 43 24 11]

Tuesday 5th of September

Drive down to the Pyranees and start walking!

To be Continued?

Well, that’s it. No more Epics, no more emails from us. We will only have good old telephone and postcard contact for quite some while. That doesn’t mean stop sending us emails about yourselves, just don’t expect an immediate reply.

And please, DON’T SEND JOKE MAIL, and don’t send email with attachments. As we only have 1MB of mail space left, and once it gets over that, stuff gets deleted against our will. So only email us collections of your beautiful words.

If you wish to write us, you can send the mail to:

Geri + Richard
C/O Lenio
60 Tudor Court
London, N1 4NU
England

Thanks all folks. Gotta Love you and Leave you. I hope to see you soonish.
Btw, you should also be able to get this epic on my web page, along with NEW PHOTOS!

We have to give our utmost thanks to both Francine and Peter, who have generously housed our dirty hinds for the past three months. They have Spoilt us and fed us and stuff. Sink one down for Francine and Peter! Hurrah!

Love
-Richard ‘Jodi/Max’ Maxwell
http://homepages.ihug.co.nz/~maxwells/OE/

P.s. 4145 words in 230 minutes ~= 1 word every 4 seconds.

Geraldine on a cold, cold Glacier. The Water was fresh though!

Geraldine took this wonderfull picture of the Athabascan Falls near Banff in Canada.

Richard Here

Well, since finishing my second epic nothing much of note has happened.

The weather is getting hotter here. 25+ with a high humidity. However that is not what concerns me, as the temperatures in Spain are 35+.

I’ve finished tweaking my OE page. Both epics are there, accompanied with various scanned photos. Because of this, the pages will be slow to load on a normal dial up connection. just jump to:

http://homepages.ihug.co.nz/~maxwells/OE/
[Editor: Link is now dead, use http://geriandricky.maxwells.net.nz/]

Books and Sunglasses

Some day last week, Geri and I decided to roller blade to the travel shop that stocked the YHA Europe hostel guide. Taking an alternative route we bladed through some of Edmonton’s suburbia. Nice.

Got to the store and bought the aforementioned book, and also a nice little spanish book too “Que Pasa”. Hehe, no longer will I be saying
WAAAAAAAAAAAAZAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRP?
instead I will be saying
¿KAAAAAY PAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRR?

Since the travel shop had traveling gear as well as books and travel agents and stuff, Geri and I did the obligatory sunglass shop, as I still have to get sunnys for spain.

Anyhow we found a pair that actually suited me, and as always, it was the most expensive pair. We then roller bladed back home, Only to be picked up by peter 5 mins from home.

hmm, what was the point of telling that? It wasn’t really anything of note was it? Bah, I suppose its inevitable that I ramble at one point in my letters.

pffft, care.

Anyway, Geri and I then started doing some serious research for our visit to vancouver and alaska, and the logistics of getting from heathrow to port-de-peid.

Boston

Both Geri and I were sleeping in monday morning when the phone rings. I was more awake than Geri, so I answered it.
“Hi, its Francine here, tell Geri to pack her bags, as we are leaving for boston in 2 hours”

oohkaaaay.

So, Our planned week going to the Klondike days festivities was overtaken by the fact that Geraldine and Francine were flying to Boston for the week. Grrr, lucky Geri.

Well, after convincing Geri that sleeping in would NOT be better than flying to Boston, Geri started packing.After the Taxi arrived, I gave her our Camera, an enveloping hug, and stern instructions to came back speaking fluent spanish (she has the spanish phrase book).

Oh dear, ill have to cook and clean for myself. who’s gonna wipe my bottom for me? *grin*

hint: when cooking with eggs, clean the fry pan STRAIGHT AWAY. Egg is a mother $%@#er to clean after it sets over 2 days.

hint: don’t use a metal scrubber to clean a non-stick fry pan, and then use it to cook eggs, then not clean it for 2 days.

hint: get the woman to cook, cos men suck at it

boys own

Well, since the GFs are out of the way, its time for GUY STUFF. We tried to catch the X-Men, but had the rotten luck to visit the cinemas 10 minutes after it had started, and we were damned if we were gonna wait 2 hours for the next session.

Video store! Well, between the two of us, peter and I have seen every single action and sci-fi movie in the video store (nearly) bah.

walking down the sci-fi isle I mentioned that I haven’t seen alien 4. So we decide to grab that. I then mention that I haven’t seen “the black hole”, walking down the isle we also get saturn 3, the nemesis, the fly (86), and, of course, Evil dead II

Mmmm, sci fi.

staying up late has its perks

Well, after watching saturn 3 (man these old sci-fi programs are wacky) I didn’t feel like going to bed, it been 25 degrees and humid and all. So I flicked channels while peter went off and fulfilled his internet scrabble addictition. I started watching the Three Musketeers on the french channel.

Come 1am, Peter came out of the study and went outside to cool down.
“Hey Richard, you might want to come outside”
I cant be bothered moving, so I just stay there watching charlie sheen speak in french.
“Its the northern lights”
Ok, this im not going to miss! I get up and go outside.

It was a clear summers night, unfortunately the light pollution from Edmonton made it hard to see. I looked at the northern lights, it was way cool. A misty gray stream across the sky, with tints of blue and green. I was expecting some cool space noises to accompany it, guess I’ve watched a bit too many american sci-fi programs.

After standing there for 5 minutes I realised how tired one gets staying up to 1am in the morning. So I call it a night.

Food

I’m hungry. I’m going for leftovers.
Cyas

-Richard ‘Jodi the Max’ Maxwell

Psycho Cats
Bad Lands
Hoodoo Gurus
Head-Smashed-In Buffalo Jump
Waterton Lakes National Park
Cameron Lake
White Mud Park
Washington DC
Niagara Falls
Canada Day Celebrations
Toronto
Lazy Days in Edmonton
You would think we would be safe from the weather
Dammit! I thought the last epic would be the only epic!

Psycho Cats

Francine and Peter have two house cats, Skippy and Buddy. Both Buddy the black, and Skippy the white have long hair, therefore you will always see cat hairs on your clothes, no matter what colour you wear. Both cats are confined to indoors, except for when someone can watch over them in the front yard. Therefore, they have a few quirks.

Buddy always wants to go outside, yet when he is, he just sits there, scared of everything (this was due to an altercation with a leash and a crazy deck-chair). Otherwise he is just a cute, cuddly, fluffy-wuffy black cat of cuteness.

Skippy is the psycho one. Skippy is the cat on which that proverb is based on. If it moves, he pounces on it. If it looks anything like a nook or cranny, he is trying to get inside it. You leave the bathroom door open while your showering or doing other stuff, Skippy will join you. And don’t even think of sleeping if you leave your bedroom door open, because toes and noses are a favorite plaything for Skippy.

Oh yea, if Skippy isn’t doing and pouncing or investigating, he is chasing Buddy around the house at 150 kph upside-down on the ceiling. While you sit on the couch watching TV, Buddy, then Skippy use your head or shoulders as a launching platform to land on the opposite wall, jump off, do a half-turn back flip and land on someone’s crotch, before disappearing down the hallway. Whew.

Bad Lands

On the weekend of the 16th Francine and Peter took us to Waterton Lakes National Park, via some interesting landmarks.

A few million years ago, there was this really big glacier in the Rocky Mountains that covered quite a bit of the Alberta planes. It retreated dumping big rocks (glacial erratics) in the middle of the flat planes, and all the melted water carved a big canyon, now called the “bad lands” (as in a bad place to cross).

In carving this canyon, lots of layers of sediment was exposed. Which was lucky, cos there was quite a lot of dinosaur skeletons to be found!

We went to Drumheller (in the badlands) and visited the Royal Tyrrell Museum of Palaeontology (dino museum!).

Saw lots of dinosaurs, took some photos. Learnt some stuff. The Museum costs CAN$ 7.50, but its well worth it. It has some interactive exhibits, and more than enough information (I got saturated after going through 45% of the museum).

Outside there are a few walks. Most of the ground is rocks and a brown-red clay colour, with little to no plant life (being a desert and all). On the walk we found a fossilised tree. Its bark was intact, but its pulp had been replaced by crystals over the few million years. Cool.

Back from our walk, and of all the things to see, we see a cute little bunny rabbit. Weird.

Hoodoo Gurus

I thought Hoodoo Gurus was just a silly name of a band, but after going to Drumheller, I now know different.

As you might or might not know, for the quest for spiritual enlightenment, some people went to far, deserted places to contemplate. After a while these people were sought out as spiritual experts, or Spiritual “Gurus”. That explains the Guru bit.

A popular place for the Gurus to go were the deserts. Sparsely populated, the Guru would have little to distract them. So, what is a hoodoo?

Over the years, different layers of sediment form. In the badlands there are layers of rock, sandstone, ironstone, clay, and other stuff.

When there is a rock on top of some sandstone, it protects the sandstone from erosion caused by the elements (rock hard, sandstone soft). Over time, erosion carves around the rock, leaving a sandstone tower topped with some rock. This is a Hoodoo.

/———\
\_________/ <- Rock(s)
\ /
|___|
| | <- Sandstone (eroded away)
/###|
/____\
/ \
=========== <- The ground
a Hoodoo

Coyote liked to topple off these rocks to crush a certain bird in those roadrunner cartoons. However, they were also favored placed for Gurus to sit while they meditate. Therefore they were called "Hoodoo Gurus". TADA!

Unfortunately, it was dusk when we took a photo, and the flash wasn’t strong enough to get the picture

We then drove to Calgary and stayed the night.

Head-Smashed-In Buffalo Jump

The next day, Francine, Peter, Geri and I went to the Waterton Lakes National Park. But before we got there we visited a place called Head-Smashed-In Buffalo Jump, which I’ll refer to as HSIBJ from now one, cos its too damn hard to type.

Before firearms and horses, the planes Indians fed on buffalo and foraged goods. When certain conditions existed, the Indians would chase a herd of buffalo off a cliff, so they would fall to their death. They would then butcher them and collect the meat and bones and stuff for food and equipment. At times they would kill a heard of 100 or more.

HSIBJ had an Interpretive center (most American and Canadian landmarks have a center where you can learn about the landmark and buy souvenirs and stuff). It also had cat sized squirrels called Marmots. They were fat and lazy, sunning themselves on the rock of the cliff-top. In addition there were cliff swallows, which build nests on the underside of rock outcrops out of stick, mud and saliva. It was quite cool.

You also learn about the impact of the stupid white man on this 1000 year old tradition. White man came and shot the buffalo for game, and managed to pretty much wipe out the entire buffalo population in 10 years or so. I bet the Indians were pissed!

Oh, We also passed a Teepee, so we took a photo for Helen.

Waterton Lakes National Park

Before we went into the actual park, we went through a fenced buffalo safari park type drive through. We got really close to some buffalo, took some photos. However it wasn’t all good clean fun at one point a buffalo decided to relieve their bowels. EWWWWW GROSS! But at the same time, strangely fascinating. The body (buffalo or otherwise) is an amazing invention!

Red rock creek gets its name because the creek is surrounded by, you guessed it, red rocks! Got some cool photos and then decided to go for a walk. We were a bit on edge because Peter bumped into someone he knew from college (waitress, hehe, too much time at the local pub eh Peter?), who said they saw a bear on the trail we were about to take. We all grabbed a bear stick (pfft, like that will stop one), and made noises all along the trip. I was told to quit that annoying whistling within 45 seconds

Saw some more beautiful falls, and no bears. Saw a Coyote on the way back. Oh yea, we also saw a moose (except me, too busy putting my shoes one) on the way to red rock creek.

We then drove to the Waterton Lakes township and checked into a hotel just across from a HI (YHA) hostel. (Geri was sure she saw a deer in someone’s back yard. Yea, whatever)

mn ftrfrrgttttttttttttttttttg

(thanks Skippy)

Walking to dinner we saw a big-horn sheep walking down the main road of the township. For some reason Geri spotting a deer in someone’s backyard sounded a little more believable now. Looked at the sky, didn’t recognize any of the constellations.

The next morning there were two deer laying on the grass by the church across the road from us. Geri got some photos of her with the deer. We then packed up and went for breakfast. Next stop, Cameron Lake.

Cameron Lake

Cameron Lake is on the US-Canadian boarder. It is also a popular place to come across Grizzly Bears (eek). There was a deer roaming around the car-park, however the thing we noticed first were the Stella-jays. These shiny blue birds look just like the blue-jay, however there colours are a much brighter and shiner blue.

While taking photos of the jays, some silly couple decided to take their dog for a walk. Beside the fact that taking dogs for walks in bear country is a dumb thing to do, taking the dog for a walk when there is a deer in plain sight is just … stupid! The dog started barking, the deer got defensive, and started to charge the dog. The girlfriend had to keep fending off the deer with a big stick. All the while everyone around the lake was watching this display. Cripes how I hate stupid people! Eventually the couple got the idea and took the dog back to the car, while the deer ran off into the woods.

Behind the lake is Mount Custer. Snow covered, it reflects in the glassy lake to make a beautiful photo opportunity. Anyway, we grabbed some bear sticks again, and went for the walk alongside the lake edge (shutup with the infernal whistling Richard!). The walk ends about 100m before the US boarder, due to the fact that the grounds around the lake are a popular bear foraging ground.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! BEARS! RUN! ……..

hehe, just joking. IT WAS A JOKE! Sheesh. No bears to be seen, we walked back had some lunch, then started the drive back home. You can hire both single and double canoes to explore the lake for only CAN$18 (I think).

On the way back we stopped off at the Oakatoke Glacial Erratic. This big rock (~18×18x9m) is in the middle of the planes of Alberta. Damn Glaciers! The field it was in was swarming with Ground Squirrels, living in their little burrows. Just as annoying to farmers as rabbits I would assume.

White Mud Park

About 50 (or 15 minutes rollerblade + 5 min walk) minutes walk from Francine’s house is Whitemud park. This is a stream surrounded with bush and trees, and a haven for all sorts of cool creatures. Geri and I have been there a few times, and the last trip we took we brought the camera with us. Beside the bright greens of the deciduous Poplar and Birches there were plenty of critters posing to get there photos taken. Red Squirrels, Least Chipmunks liked to hang around a lookout, where people like to feed them seed and so forth. We got some very style-ee close-ups.

While walking through the poplar forest bit of the walk, we passed an old couple, one of them asked
“Forgive me if I’m wrong, but are you two from New Zealand?”
Geri and I were shocked, until we remembered that my day-pack has the New Zealand flag on it. Anyway, we got chatting, exchanged stories, and so forth. Art and Effie Hobden were a retired couple who had done lots of traveling around Canada, had experienced a hungry bear attack (Grizzlies are bigger than black bear, and when they have been spoiled by human feeding, can get quite over-zealous when they see a car).

Tip: Don’t turn off the engine when stopping to look at bears, and definitely do not break down when a bear is climbing onto, and rocking your car.

Art noticed that Geraldine was admiring his walking stick. He then surprised us both by offering the stick to Geri to keep! After saying “are you sure?” 1000 times, Geri accepted the gift with much thanks and praise. Now Geraldine has a nice dole stick with a screw on the end (to prevent slipping, and to ward off killer dogs)

Art and Effie had lived in Edmonton for quite a few years, and were quite shocked to hear that we were going to photograph some beavers that were on the river. They said that beavers are quite a rare sighting, and are mostly nocturnal. Well, Geri and I have already seen beavers the last two times we had been at White Mud. Well, we walked to the “beaver place” and lo and behold, BEAVERS!

At first we couldn’t see any, but then eagle-eye Geri spotted on moving on the river bank 100m away. So I walked off path alongside the river and took a photo. Geri also spotted a muskrat (a Vole with similar habits as the beaver) so I took a photo of that as well. Unfortunately it was and over cast day, and I was at full zoom, therefore my shakiness blurred the photos somewhat. Hehe, no matter – we can always come back for more.

Washington DC

We spent most of the days in Edmonton going to parks or visiting landmarks. However we were most surprised when Francine said that she is going to Washington DC for a work trade show, and that she can TAKE US WITH HER!

We arrived at night, which is cool, because all the landmarks are in lights. We got a ride with an Afghan Taxi Driver to our hotel, the HILTON Garden Inn. We couldn’t help not to see the Washington Monument all lit up with lights (big concrete spike).

Day 1

Next day we went to The Mall and had a look around. The Mall is a big park in the middle of Washington with all the famous monuments in it. It has the Lincoln Memorial, the Washington Monument, The reflecting pools ‘Forrest! Forrest!’
The Vietnam memorial, that wall with all the names of the dead on it. Capitol Hill (i.e. Parliament Building) and plenty of Red Squirrels.

Did I mention it was hot. 83, with a due-point of 74 (29 degrees C, 90% Humidity). Oh yea, the water tasted like pool-water. Remembering of course, that fast food joints make their drinks using the local water…

Day 2

On day two of our little vacation we walked to the US Capitol. Of all the things to see in Washington, we bump into two Canadian Mounties!
They were there to promote Canada day (which unfortunately lies 3 days before independence day) at the Canadian Embassy. We got our photos taken and continued our walk along Pennsylvania Ave. Spotted the FBI building that was meant to have been blown up in Arlington Rd, and took some more photos.

Finally got to the US Capitol. Lined up for the self guided tour (15 people every 5 minutes, guided is 40 people every 30 minutes). We walked around the building, saw lots of cool architecture and art and stuff. I then decided I wanted to see the Senate and House of representatives in session (god knows why, we all know how boring politicians are to watch). Anyway, after 5 minutes of the Representatives, and Geri was clinically brain dead. So I dragged her out, and took her to the senate for more torture.
“I know only the boring get bored, but they are so boring they are boring ME”
Everyone in the public gallery was looking at something, apparently some Kennedys are still alive. Pity I dunno what one looks like, so I had no idea which one of the senators was senator Kennedy.

Day 3

Three is the charm. Boy, was it ever?! We went to the White House (1600 Pennsylvania Ave.) and saw the President. Took a photo, and then went on our merry way. We then took Francine to the Lincoln Memorial, after which we parted ways, she went back to the hotel to do some work, and we started our trek to Virginia.

Once in Virginia we visited Arlington National Cemetery. We visited the Graves of JFK and the Kennedys, and the Challenger Space Shuttle victims. Also of note was the changing of the guard at the tomb of the unknown solider. Symbolising the 21 gun salute, a solider will watch the grave for 21 seconds, turn, wait 21 seconds, do 21 paces over 21 seconds, turn, watch the grave for 21 seconds, turn, wait 21 seconds, do 21 paces, etc. After 30 minutes the guard will be changed with military precision. An additional bonus was that during the changing of the guard, silence was mandatory, its quite nice when Americans shut up for a while. The Vigil and Changing of the Guard has been happening for so long now, that the marble has black stains where the solider makes their paces.

After the trek back to Washington DC we visited the Korean war memorial before heading back to the hotel.

Day 4

EARLY. In order to go for a tour through the White House, you have to have a ticket (free). In order to get a ticket you have to go to the White House Visitor Information Centre. Unfortunately there are a limited amount of tickets, and they go fast(1000).

We left our hotel at 6am in the morning, and got to the ticket place at 6:05. There were at least 200 people already lined up! I believe the first guy got there at 4am in the morning! They had some staff organising the queue. One in particular (60+ year old black man in a suit) yelled at people when they stepped out of line onto the footpath. ‘Twas funny (”GEEERORFF DA SIDEWAALLK BOOYEEE”). Anyway, the line was stopped after 6:30am, because the daily quota of people had been filled, therefore everyone arriving after then were turned back.

We waited till 7:30am for the ticket place to open, and then waited another half hour to get our tickets. As we basically left the hotel as soon as the alarm clock rang, we were itching to get back and have a shower as we were feeling quite stinky.

Come 11:45am we Francine, Geri and I left the hotel for our 12pm tour. We arrive at the meeting place and wait half an hour to actually start walking to the White House. Into the east wing, past the X-ray machine we walked. The Library, Vermeil Room, China Room, East Room, Green Room, Blue Room, Red Room, State Dining Room, Entrance and Cross Halls we walked. Unable to take photos inside we took some close up photos just outside the front entrance. And with that our visit to Washington DC was over.

A quick taxi to the Airport, a lost chance to photograph the Pentagon, and a 3 hour wait in the executive lounge (free drinks, booze and food, thanks Francine!) and we were off to Toronto!

Note:
For those who haven’t seen “Forrest Gump”, it was one of the reflecting pools that Jenny wades into yelling “Forrest!” to get Forrest’s attention at the anti-war rally in Washington DC.

Niagara Falls

If you want to see the falls, see them from Canada!

We arrived in Toronto and headed straight to the hotel. Geri and I got comfy, while Francine had to leave again to meet Peter, who was flying in from Edmonton, and was due to arrive at 11pm. The next day we got a rental car, and left for the hours drive to Niagara Falls, wooop!

There are two falls, the American Falls, and the more famous Canadian Horseshoe falls. Photos Galore! There is also an old scowl stuck before the Horseshoe falls. Interesting story about that. It broke loose in 1918, the two guys on it opened the bay doors so it would run aground. The then spent a night just 100m away from the falls before being rescued the next day. They were saved by a rope fired from the roof of the power station on the side of the river. Cool eh?

Did I mention it was bloody hot, it was 30 degrees again and humid to boot.

We did the next thing that you MUST DO when visiting Niagara Falls, and that is to take a trip on the Maid of the Mist ($CAN 10.25, no CC, travelers cheques accepted). You get a free blue plastic raincoat with hood, and boy, do you need it.

TIP: ALWAYS use lens filters for your Camera lens. They cost $NZ 30, and are easier to replace than a $300 camera lens.

FREE SHOWERS! Everyone was yelling and cheering, which was weird considering they were being drenched head to toe with mist from the falls. The view from the boat of the horseshoe falls was beyond comprehension, and by all meanings of the word, AWESOME! I Tried to get a photo, but by the time I pulled my Camera from pointing down to pointing at the falls, then lens was completely covered in water. Bah!
No doubt the highlight of the trip, if you go to Niagara, you go on the maid, period!

Geri and I grabbed a Maple Leaf to press in our diaries.

Thought: Is Viagara a combination of Niagara and virility? It would make sense, all the power of the falls mixed in with lost virility. Hmmmm.

Before going back to Toronto we stopped off at the Whirlpool and ‘Niagara on the Lake’ township. The Whirlpool is a whirlpool in the direct meaning of the word: A pool with whirling water. While the township was a nice tourist trap, with old fashioned buildings and outrageous prices. The only saving grace of the township was the fact that it was cherry picking season. Mmmm, big fat cherries.

We then headed back to Toronto to catch the Canada Day Fireworks displays.

Canada Day Celebrations

Being July the first, it was Canada day. At this point I became envious of Canadians. All around me, I see kids with the Canadian flag painted on their face, in Niagara there were kids cycling down the road with a big Canadian flag blowing in the wind, soliciting toots from passing cars. People having barbies and generally feeling good about being Canadian. I have never seen this sort of national pride about being a New Zealander, sure we might celebrate a sporting achievement, but that’s the closest we get to national pride. No-one is proud of just being a Kiwi. Bah.

Enough rambling. Francine rang up a guy who she met on the Edmonton-Toronto flight. He offered to take us out on one of his boats during the fireworks display. We got into Downtown Toronto just in time for the fireworks celebration, and to be stuck in a big Canada Day Celebration Traffic Jam.

20 minutes later, we met up with Francine’s friend who was organising parking for the yacht club which just happened to be in downtown Toronto, for some reason he didn’t expect it to be so busy on Canada Day, hehe.

Halfway through the fireworks at 11pm, Francine’s friend got us all onto a yacht, and we motored into the harbour for an uninterrupted view of the last of the fireworks. Ooooooh, aaaaaaah.

After 15 minutes of skippy sitting on my hands while I write this, hehe.

After 15 minutes of the last of SLKIPPYGEORRF!

After the last of the fireworks finished, we motored back into the marina dock and walked to a local bar. SKIPPY! QUIT LICKING MY HAIR!
Francine and her friend got two jugs of beer. MMM BEER! First beer in over a month. It was nice. Geri and I played a bad game of darts before
Fancine’s friend disappeared and we all retired back to the hotel.

Toronto

Ever had a bad travel day, you know, when you go to all the wrong places and miss out on all the good deals. Well, that happened to us the next day.

We went back to downtown Toronto to have a mosey. Francine and Peter decided to go up the CN tower ($18 or $35 with a breakfast) Geri and I were a little low on money, so we decided to pass.

ARGH! BAD LUCK! We later found out that with our YHA cards we could have got 50% off the price, and that the CN tower is the largest free-standing tower in the world. Ahhh #*@!.

Geri and I decided to visit the Kensington markets. Initially we walked the wrong way and ended up at the waterfront. That wasn’t all bad, because it was quite nice there. You could get a return fare to Toronto Island for only $CAN 5, but we passed because we wouldn’t have enough time to do that and go to the markets.

Being quite hungry (and poor) we grabbed a hot-dog to share between us for $CAN 2.50

ARGH! BAD LUCK! Just 100m down the road was another hot-dog stall selling the same thing for just $2. Bah. That and the fact that Quad Sausages sell for only $NZ 1 back home. Ahhh #*@!.

We then found a food stall selling all sorts of foods. We decided on sharing a plate of Indian food with some chicken curry. Mmmmm, yum. All full again we set off for our walk to the markets. Many a time we were tempted to take a tram ride, but we decided we needed the exercise.

All of a sudden we were in the middle of road to store wall of Chinese people drinking coconut milk from coconuts. Consulting our not to scale map we found out that just before the markets there was China Town. Eek. Shuffling through the crowds we finally made it completely past where the Kensington Markets should have been. MAP! Oh, its actually down a side street, cool. Had a look round, nothing much to rave about, just a few alternative cloths shops and craft stores. It was now 4pm, and we had to walk the hours walk back to the car to meet Francine and Peter.

Oh yea, there was a block of Fur shops on the way to the markets. Weird. Sort of had a corrupt dirty dodgy feel to it.

An hour later we got back to the car park to meet Francine and Peter. They apoligised for not making clear how far away the markets were, and then told us that they wanted to go there so they could get some stuff.

AAAAAARG! WHY COULDN’T THEY HAVE SAID THAT _BEFORE_ WE WENT! &$#^%ing #^%@# #$%ed #%@er! We pretty much spent all day walking to and from those markets. We could have done something else, like go to the island or something, bah!

Did I mention it was bloody hot (again), 30 degrees and humid to boot.

We went back to the markets and Francine brought some marble carved bookends. While Geri and I make a wise $2 investment on some fold out fans. We then hopped back into the car and drove back to the hotel.

No NO NOOOO! Looking on Francine’s and Peters map we found out that we actually never made it to Kensington markets. That we missed out seeing them by 1 block. ARGH BAD LUCK! ^#*%! What a waste of a day. ^&^$!

The next morning we caught the flight back home. Wow, what a cool holiday.

Note: If you are going to Toronto do the following:
1) Visit the Island (CAN $5 return ferry)
2) Visit Casa Loma (Castle built in romantic 17th Centery styles, with lots of catacombs and underground tunnels)
3) Actually make it to the Kensington Markets
4) Visit China Town
5) Go up the CN tower with a YHA/HI card (CAN $9)
6) Downtown

Lazy Days in Edmonton

The last few weeks in Edmonton have been spent stuck inside due to rain, working, or touring the City. Summer is here, and it’s been quite humid, with temperatures averaging 24-28 degrees Celsius.

The Summer festivals have started. The first one we went to was the street performers festival. The sort of acts you saw in the Cup Village during the Americas Cup. Juggling, stilt walking, magic and public embarrassment were the tools of the performer.

Alberta has its own Government, and Edmonton is the Capital. The Legislator building is the place were the stuff happens. We went for a free tour and saw all the history and cool stuff. However one thing stood out. There is a fountain in the Foyer of the building. On the third floor there is a spot, that because of an acoustic anomaly, exhibits strange characteristics. If you stand in this spot, it sounds like you are having a dry shower, move 2cm either way, and all you hear are the echoes of the fountain downstairs. Very cool.

For a town of 500,000 Edmonton certainly has cooler stuff than Auckland. The town hall is a big glass pyramid (it was built over the old town hall and finished in 1992 for a total cost of $20 million, 1% of which was spent on the art to decorate the building). The Council chambers has a retractable roof to let the natural light in, how cool is that?

Out the front of the town hall is a fountain pool. When we were there, it was full of people bathing and playing in the fountains that sprayed inwards from the sides of the pool. Apparently it doubles as a public ice rink in winter. Yet again, cool.

You would think we would be safe from the weather

Unfortunately all this hot humid weather is not a good thing. A Cold front came over on top of the hot humid air and caused lighting storms, and more ominously, tornado funnels.

We were driving back home one day after working on the sections when we hear about a funnel touching town creating a tornado! Luckily for us it touched down in Red Deer, 150km south of Edmonton. Unfortunately for them, it touched down in the middle of a trailer park, killing 10 people, and injuring over 500. Summer isn’t so great when you live in fear of tornadoes.

Dammit! I thought the last epic would be the only epic.

Well, that’s all folks. You should be up to date with our exploits to date. I have written over 5000 words, and typed for over 12 hours doing this epic, and I’m not going do it again!

Have fun using this to put you to sleep.

-Richard ‘Jodi/Max’ Maxwell

Ps. Thanks to Geri for proofing and adding the odd snippet/correction.